Well – quite a lot I suppose.
He showed early promise as a performer as a five year old when, undeterred by the norms and conventions of 1970’s British (and Yorkshire) society, in front of a playground full of on-looking children & dinner ladies, he exposed himself. But he didn’t stop there. Oh no!
He didn’t just expose himself – no – he waggled it! (Get in there my son!) It was a very proud day in the Williams household, however only within the confines of his own bedroom, where he was kept in solitary confinement for the next 3 years. His family still remain traumatised by the entire episode.
By the time he became a teenager, he was doing all of the typical teenage things – you know – singing in bands, picking zits, thinking about breasts and masturbating. It was then and there he decided where he wanted his future to be. Not the thinking about breasts and masturbating bit, although it would be a lie to deny that those activities do, on occasion, feature in his daily routine.
By the time he got to University (yes – I know – it’s quite a surprise isn’t it? Despite his vacant gawping face, which gives the impression that he’s one of those people who can’t breathe without having their mouths wide open, he’s quite intelligent), he realised that something else was missing in his life, namely comedy. He joined the highly unsuccessful and now long-forgotten Hull-based comedy troupe The Laughing Crab (okay – so he studied in Hull, so he can’t be that intelligent I suppose!). He did that for a couple of years, until his finals came along and he decided that he should really do a bit of studying – otherwise his parents might have put him back in solitary. (Nooooooooooooooo!)
He did a bit of singing during his 20s and then one day, during a fit of rather over-enthusiastic beard stroking, decided he was going to write a bit of poetry. (What a complete puff!). He fell in love with performance poetry, performing under the pseudonym AYM. He was the very first winner of the now-legendary Hammer & Tongue Slam, as well as the first winner of SlamIdol – the very first internet-based Slam. (Didn’t he do well).
He did this for a few more years (yawn!) Then one day, something changed (Oooooh!). When sitting in Madrid airport waiting for a flight back to London, with a bottle of Sol in his hand (that’ll explain it!), he came up with a few comedy characters. Within a couple of months, he had written several dozen sketches and within six months, he had hooked up with an old comedy chum (no, not in that way!) to form the comedy writing group The Guild of the Forbidden Helmet.
In early 2009, after a 17 year absence, he turned his hand to stand-up again.
The journey continues…